|
Post by heidie on Oct 26, 2010 6:20:28 GMT -1
The other day oan ra telly somewan sais they hatit Dawn French......when asked why he sais he didny like anythin Lenny Henry hud been in...
Well Ah thot it wis funny..............
|
|
|
Post by ozneil on Oct 26, 2010 7:17:12 GMT -1
So did I
|
|
|
Post by notanimby on Oct 26, 2010 11:24:35 GMT -1
HMS Astute crashes intae Skye wunner whut will happen tae its sister ship HMS Styoopit
|
|
|
Post by heidie on Oct 26, 2010 16:18:19 GMT -1
Well if a submarreen kin crash inty ra sky the sistuur ship wull crash inty ra grun.....
|
|
|
Post by notanimby on Oct 26, 2010 17:11:26 GMT -1
Well if a submarreen kin crash inty ra sky the sistuur ship wull crash inty ra grun..... Ab belive the captain of HMS Astute wiz frea West DUMBastardshire
|
|
|
Post by heidie on Oct 26, 2010 17:16:05 GMT -1
Aye mibbes yer rite cos the only thing tae dae wi sailirs in greenok is ra prossies...........
|
|
|
Post by ozneil on Nov 2, 2010 18:43:58 GMT -1
A man is stopped by the Police at midnight, and asked where he's going.
"I'm on my way to a lecture about the effects of alcohol and drug abuse on the human body".
The Policeman asks "Really? and who's going to give a lecture at this time of night?"
"My wife"….
|
|
|
Post by heidie on Nov 2, 2010 19:34:00 GMT -1
Little Bruce and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they know they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand. Bruce bravely walks up to him and says, "Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage." Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, "Well Bruce, you are only 10.. Where will you two live?" Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies, "In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit there nicely." Still thinking this is just adorable, Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay, then how will you live? You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support Jenny." Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance, Jenny makes five bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week. That's about 60 bucks a month, so that should do us just fine." Mr. Smith is impressed Bruce has put so much thought into this. "Well Bruce, it seems like you have everything figured out. I just have one more question. What will you do if the two of you should have little children of your own?" Bruce just shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, we've been lucky so far." Mr. Smith no longer thinks the little shit is adorable
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Nov 3, 2010 0:28:39 GMT -1
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Nov 3, 2010 14:32:34 GMT -1
Where's the next part? I was howling at this, loved the arranged marriage - a pair of ***** pure genius!
|
|
|
Post by Sir Henry Rawlinson on Nov 4, 2010 14:16:58 GMT -1
Highlight the txt below to read it only if you are broad minded.... What will Jade Goody be doing for XMAS?
Baby sitting for Lilly Allen !
|
|
|
Post by heidie on Nov 4, 2010 15:10:10 GMT -1
A friend, who worked away from home all week, always made a morning Available when he would take his 7-year old granddaughter for a drive in The car for some bonding time -- just him and his granddaughter.
One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold and just wanted to stay In bed. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take Their granddaughter out in the car.
When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see how her Grandfather was.
'Well, did you enjoy your ride with Grandma?'
'Great, Grandpa' the girl replied, 'and do you know what? We didn't see a Single tosser, blind bastard, dick-head or wanker anywhere today!'
Almost brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?
|
|
|
Post by sistersludge on Nov 5, 2010 5:56:13 GMT -1
Highlight the txt below to read it only if you are broad minded.... What will Jade Goody be doing for XMAS?
Baby sitting for Lilly Allen ! that's the kind of joke a dikhead would tell
|
|
|
Post by notanimby on Nov 5, 2010 6:46:50 GMT -1
Highlight the txt below to read it only if you are broad minded.... What will Jade Goody be doing for XMAS?
Baby sitting for Lilly Allen ! that's the kind of joke a dikhead would tell No - thats the kind of joke only an erse would read and then complain aboot despite being warned of its content, with that content bein obscured tae prevent teh likes of yoo gettin thur knickers in a twist on ithur peoples behalf
|
|
|
Post by bormes on Nov 5, 2010 7:46:36 GMT -1
Nota, The World is FULL of punters being outraged on behalf of "others" Look at thon clown yesterday, she tried to kill an MP by stabbing him and she got a life sentence for her attempt. Outside the court these clowns are shouting anti UK abuse and showing posters of anti UK content, well if that is not inciting riot what is? Why were they not arrested?
|
|